I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
the night ended with taco bell and tears
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
