um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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