fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
