My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
