I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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