handjob tips. give me some.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Randomize
