He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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