K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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