return my video game
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I need water and some morals
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
