I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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