I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
