lets start a swedish sibling band together
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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