the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
