I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
3 2 1 whiskey
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
