You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
They took my balls.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
