It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize