i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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