whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
