If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
