Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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