hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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