It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
