thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
