Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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