somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I think people are normalizing furries
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
