Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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