you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Randomize
