it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I need moral support for this bender
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
