i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
