Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'm too high and old for this...
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
