what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
