Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
