Why are handjobs necessary in class?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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