You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
