Joe is yelling at the trees again.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
