i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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