we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
