Me too!
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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