Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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