i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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