And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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