Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize