We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
