If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
