AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
