A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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