That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
