She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
