for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
