shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
My pussy is not your playground.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
